What's In A Name?

Names are such interesting devices. Growing up, I thought it would be cool to have a name like Marcia or Cindy. They seemed like much hipper options than my name, the more traditional, classic Elizabeth. I recall my mother saying other name options for me included Hannah, Isabelle and Bronwyn. Hmm, hard to imagine any of those as my name now. I wonder if or how I would be different had I been given one of those names. I am glad I bear the name of two great-grandmothers, but I didn't - and still don't - like the fact that my name has 30-some derivatives.


The only nickname I've ever been comfortable with is Beth. My dad called me Beth, though my mother never did - she wanted my nickname to be Betsy. In fourth grade, there were two Elizabeths and the teacher suggested it would be easier (for her) if one of us could be called by a different name. She probably thought with 30-some derivatives, chances were pretty good one of us had a nickname. Elizabeth Henry didn't seem interested in being called anything other than her full name (I wonder if that ever changed), so I volunteered to be called Beth, and Beth it became for the rest of my educational career. When I finished college and went to work, I assumed Elizabeth as my professional moniker.


The one nickname I've never liked is Liz or Lizzie, most likely because of the Lizzie Borden childhood rhyme and because that's the name most people seem to automatically default to without asking. I used to adamantly correct their assumptions, but have become better at just rolling with it. For some people, Liz is a good fit ... short, chic, classy. It's just never worked for me.


But now I have the opportunity to choose a new name. Cindy and Marcia are no longer favorites and not really appropriate in this instance. You see, I'm going to become a grandmother in several months (you have no idea how weird it is to type those words) and I get to select what I'd like to be called. I realize spending too much time debating this could be fruitless as the little one may create his or her own name for me, which would be delightful. As long as it's not Liz.

The baby will have three grandmothers. The other grandmothers have selected Nana and Grandma. Of course, it's perfectly fine to have more than one Nana or Grandma (I had two Grandmas), but I'm leaning toward something different. I read somewhere once about grandparents who were called Lolly and Pop. I still kind of like that combo, but I may like it more in theory than in reality. It may be borderline too cute. So one afternoon last week, I Googled - because how did we ever make decisions before Google? - "names for grandmother." Oh, really, you should do it just for fun. The scope of results is quite entertaining. The award for oddest goes to "Peaches" or "Banana." The unusual "Grammar" caught my eye," in light of my love of language. And I'm not really a Memaw or Mom-maw, because they wear floppy straw hats, live in the south and go to garden club, right?


So after I finished chuckling my way through the Google results, I clicked through to a quiz that would tell me what grandmother name is perfect for me. I answered the series of questions and eagerly anticipated the results. What should my name be? Without further ado, the results said:

You Are Definitely Glamma!

You're always perfectly turned out, never dowdy. Your grandchildren will never be embarrassed to be seen with you, and they'll appreciate your well-chosen gifts. As they get older, they'll seek your advice about fashion and grooming. Although you have a stunning exterior, there's more substance to you than your critics could imagine. Glamma is the perfect grandmother name for you, but Mimi, Bella and Gigi are other apt choices.

Hmm. I think the quiz may be a bit flawed, specifically because my answers to the "what clothing are you most likely to wear" questions were "a plain t-shirt" and "yoga pants." No self-respecting Glamma who is "perfectly turned out" would be seen in plain t-shirts and yoga pants in public (or cozy, heavy duty sweats during arctic temps, as the case may be). And my advice about fashion and grooming could easily be summed up with, "Be clean and keep your hair out of your eyes." Well, and for girls, my mother's "wear lipstick and earrings in public" advice, which I usually try to follow.

I'm pretty sure Glamma is headed for the slush pile along with Grammar, Peaches and Banana. I actually think Mimi, Bella and Gigi could be contenders. And I'll keep Lolly in the mix, along with Gram. So many choices. There's a lot of potential, self-inflicted pressure in this name game. And so the quest continues ...