Present

Linking up today with Five Minute Friday. Today's word prompt is present.

I think one of the most significant gifts we can give one another is the gift of being present. That's not a new theory in this age of instant communication, chronic distraction that many of us find ourselves in. Since the advent of the smartphone, many have bemoaned the fact that is so easily allows us to avoid being present with the people we are with at any given moment. I recently got a new phone and I find myself intentionally leaving it on my desk or putting it aside. I even considered, gasp, not getting a smartphone at all. Many survive and even thrive without one.

But I think I realized the importance of the gift of being present when walking with Pam on her journey through cancer. Ironically, the motivation for getting a smartphone was to allow me to stay connected with clients and work when I was being present with her, sitting in waiting rooms waiting for her, spending the day with her while she napped, just spending time in the same place.

When someone you love is ill, it's hard sometimes to find your role, to know what you are to be doing. Many people love the one you love and all want to help and sometimes it can be frustrating when you want to serve in a way that someone else has already taken over. But one day, I had an epiphany. I said to Pam, "I've figured it out. My job, my gift, is to be ... to be present with you, to be in your home, to walk by your side. There are many doers, and I'm one of them, but my primary role is just to be." Not surprisingly, she'd come to the same realization, probably sooner than I had. This part of our story deserves a longer, more thought-through post than a Five Minute Friday entry, but it's what came to mind when I saw today's word prompt.

I've carried the lesson of being present with me ever since. In the big things - like going with a friend to the hospital/emergency room/test - I find it easier to be present than in the little things when I allow myself to be distracted by the day-to-day to-do lists that run through my mind non-stop. But I'll keep trying to improve my ability and desire to be present for it really is a gift.